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Tuesday, February 15, 2011

First Kiss

He rose first.  I lightly grasped his hand as he pulled me up from the couch.  It seemed like I floated into his arms.

Behind us the credits of the movie scrolled down the screen accompanied by a romantic song creating a perfect setting.  His eyes peered down at me as I raised my chin ever so slightly to gaze into them.

The popular movie just ending featured a matchmaker finding love for others and eventually him.  A scene played collectively in our minds.  The matchmaker is coaching his friend on how to get the perfect kiss; ‘You come 90% and let her come the last 10%.’

The air hung with tension as he wrapped his arms around my back.  I felt a slight pressure, a little push that melted our two bodies into one.

Many dates had passed, but never a kiss.

My heart beat faster as my hands encircled his around his back.  Time slowed as he tucked a stray strand of hair behind my ear.

He lifted my face gingerly to the perfect angle.  His eyes closed.  My eyes closed.  My body seemed weightless as I lifted up slightly to my toes.  His lips found mine and closed upon them.

Time seemed to stop.  My heart rose and my breath caught.  My hand slid up his back, his wrapped around my neck.  Together we pulled ourselves together. 

Time sped back up and reality came back.  My heart raced still and my breath came out in short supply.  We smiled which quickly turned into a giggle as we commented on the scene from the movie.

The television screen was blank as we hugged once more.  I looked up to the see his happy smile and I knew then that this was the man I would marry.

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This was an exercise in memoir writing brought to you by The Red Dress Club's prompt after you died your child will be able to see a 5 minute period of you life through your eyes.  I chose our first kiss because I always want my girls to know just how much I love Andrew.

I am not impressed with this myself.  I want to describe more.  I want to make it more so that you feel you are there.  What I heard, what I smell, what I see, it always feels like I'm dragging it along, but maybe that's how memoir writing seems?  I feel like I wrote above in short choppy sentences, but I am also my worst critic.  Please provide constructive criticism, every little bit helps!

2 comments:

  1. Oh, how I adore a love story!
    What a wonderful memory...such beautiful moments.

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  2. I loved this. I wrote something somewhat similar, but didn't include the first kiss part, maybe because I felt the same way you do after you wrote it, I just couldn't capture all of the important aspects of the memory that made it so real to me, ya know? And that's OK. I think in this situation we're supposed to be there, but not be YOU. Although maybe that's not right, and others might not agree, but I think you helped me see the experience through your eyes, and I didn't need to feel every second of it in order to do so. Though I felt much of it, and that was enough. Am I making ANY sense?

    And that's why this (all of it!) is perfect for me.

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