Followers

Friday, February 25, 2011

Games for Free

It was a Friday night, and Sara was actually enjoying being alone.  For the first time in months she could relax on the couch without being annoyed by him and his games.

Instinctively her eyes shot to the pile of discarded video games piled next to the Playstation.  When she had kicked him out it was just with the clothes on his back, and he had yet to grow the balls to come pick up the games he stored at her house.

Sara smirked, which turned into a grin, morphed into a giggle and ended up as a full out laugh.  She was so going to get him back for all those nights being tortured by those games.  She wanted to go out, spend time with friends, make memories and enjoy life, but all he wanted to do was sit his butt in that curved spot on the couch and play those damn games.  Hell, the other night she stripped for him standing right in front of the television only to be asked to scoot out of the way before his quarterback was sacked.  That was the only guy that got sacked that night.

Those games hadn’t existed when they first started dating.  It was all about her.  He doted over her and treated her like royalty, but now the only royalty was the queen on the damned story line game so dark and twisted it scared her just to watch it.

Well, tonight was the night she would make a move of her own.  Grabbing her laptop, Sara quickly logged on to Craigslist and just started typing.

Gamers perfect night for Free

Playstation for free.
Playstation games for free.
They won’t cost much; just your social life and female attention.

Have you always wanted to be that cool jock that all the girls all falling over except that you have no athletic ability at all?  I have a football, basketball, baseball and hockey game all for you jock fantasies.  They come complete with scantily-dressed cheerleaders and fake bouncy boobs.

Do you want to live in a fantasy or science-fiction world?  Chase down witches and fight off dragons in order to save the princess?  Well, I’ve got a game for that too.  Just make sure you enjoy the appreciation from the princess waiting in the bed, because I can guarantee there will not be a real one waiting in your bed that night.

Want to make a perfect life?  I have that game for you too.  I’ll even throw in a bottle of lotion because I’m sure you’ll need it after seeing the fake variations of perverted guy’s visions of females.

So, if you want to give up interaction with people who breathe, touch and feel; then come right on over and take these games from me.  Because there is now way in hell I’m giving them back to my ex.

This attempt at humor writing comes from The Red Dress Club prompt:  Write a humorous Craigslist ad for selling something after a break-up.  I agree ... it's harder to be funny than serious and twisted.

13 comments:

  1. This was extremely funny-in a dry humor sort of way which is my absolutely favorite kind of humor.

    And this line alone is priceless-

    "Hell, the other night she stripped for him standing right in front of the television only to be asked to scoot out of the way before his quarterback was sacked. That was the only guy that got sacked that night." (Love it!!)

    Great job with this prompt!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Very funny! I think many of us girls can relate to this one.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Too funny and wow, I felt like I was in college again. Well done!

    ReplyDelete
  4. I think my husband feels the same way about me and my twitter..

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh, to be involved with a gamer! Bad news for sure....

    I love the descriptions of the games and the sarcastic twist on how lame-o it is to "live" in those worlds!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Very funny! "Just make sure you enjoy the appreciation from the princess waiting in the bed, because I can guarantee there will not be a real one waiting in your bed that night."

    Love it!

    ReplyDelete
  7. "Do you want to live in a fantasy or science-fiction world? Chase down witches and fight off dragons in order to save the princess? Well, I’ve got a game for that too. " Hilarious!

    ReplyDelete
  8. Funny! I loved the line about throwing in the lotion. Ha!

    ReplyDelete
  9. That was the only guy that got sacked that night.

    One of many very funny lines. You can do funny. This is proof.

    ReplyDelete
  10. i thought you did a great job, gamer widows everywhere totally get you. :D this is so true too: They won’t cost much; just your social life and female attention.

    ReplyDelete
  11. The first line of the ad alone had me cracking up - you summed up the entire obsession, I think! ;-)

    ReplyDelete
  12. My husband feels the same way about my evening blogging - the only time I have most days. I'm pretty sure he'd have my laptop on craigslist.

    Nicely written.

    ReplyDelete

comments make the world go round, kind words make the sun shine, and nice thoughts make the rain fall ... what? the flowers have to grow somehow ...